Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Summer movie reviews

Seeing as today is the start of Fall, I decided to give everyone a review of the summer movies I saw. There will also be some that I did not see. For some reason, movies that came out in May were considered summer movies, so Wolverine and Star Trek will be reviewed.

Also, I enjoy movies, but I am not that hard to please. You will never hear me talk about cinematography or that kind of stuff. So this is a simple review. I either liked it or I didn't.

Wolverine - C-: Gambit and Deadpool (the correct Deadpool) are not in this movie very much. Just like in X-Men: The Last Stand, the makers of the film just tried to put in as many mutants as they could to draw people to the movie. It worked.

I went expecting Gambit to have a large role, and Ryan Reynolds as Deadpool was perfect casting. Instead I got 10 minutes of those two combined, lots of action and a storyline that didn't make a lot of sense. While I was fine with Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen's subpar plot, Wolverine just annoyed me. It wasn't accurate, and even the great action scenes couldn't rescue it.

Star Trek - B: I'm not a big Star Trek guy, but this was a fun movie. Special effects were cool, acting was surprisingly good and the story made sense. It's weird seeing a movie with Harold in it, but no Kumar. And then to see Harold being a expert, weird lightsabre-esque swordsman was even more surprising.

Loved that Leonard Nemoy made an appearance and think this was a good reboot for the franchise.

The Hangover - B+: Really funny. Not on Old School or Slackers level (yes, I said Slackers. Deal with it), but it was very enjoyable. Zach Galifinakis steals the show and reminds us all how cool it is to be in a wolf pack.

It probably would have been an A- if not for my inexplicable hatred for Bradley Cooper. Don't ask me why I hate him, I just told you it's inexplicable and I have no reason I can think of. Something in my subconscious just hates on the man.

Public Enemies - B-: It wasn't bad. It just wasn't anything special either. I'd take the Untouchables over it any day of the week. Johnny Depp did a good job as John Dillinger, but his was the only noteworthy performance. Billy Crudup as J. Edgar Hoover was cool, but he just wasn't in the movie enough.

Christian Bale as Melvin Pervis was interesting. I saw it with Swan, who had read up on all these people, and the potrayal of Pervis was very inaccurate he said. In the movie, Bale was a one man, crime fighting, gangster killing machine. Early in the movie he kills Pretty Boy Floyd (who was in the movie for all of two minutes), when that never happened. There was also the multiple kills he had near the end of the movie that never happened in real life.

It kind of makes you wonder if Bale had some rewrites so he could look more badass. I was half expecting him to show up in his Batman costume at one point.

The Orphan - Did not see: I remember this movie coming out a long time ago when it was called The Omen. Why pay to see it again?

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - A: Loved it. What is more fun than seeing giant robots from outer space blowing each other, and everything around them, sky high? I can't think of anything other than Keira Knightley.

Sure the story is kind of weak and there are no Oscar performances here, but this is Transformers people. You don't see it for either of those two things. You see it to escape for two hours, enjoy a lot of special effects, debate if Megen Fox is hot or just slutty, some quirky lines and to see robots fighting. Optimus Prime is amazing in this one because he went from getting his ass handed to him by Megatron in the first one, to taking on several Decepticons, including Megatron, all at once. He also talks more smack than Miami Dolphins' Joey Porter. It's hilarious.

Try and ignore the twins Autobots that appear to be terrible steretypes. I actually felt dirty for laughing at them a few times.

G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra - Did not see: Remember that inexplicable hatred for Bradley Cooper I have? It goes double for Channing Tatum. I'll probably rent it at some point because I have an inexplicable love for Dennis Quaid. I'm still trying to figure out what accent he was shooting for in Dragonheart.

The Ugly Truth - F: I have a beautiful girlfriend whom I love very much. So there are occasions that she wants to see some pretty awful looking romantic comedies, and I get to go with her. That is how this occurred.

It was the worst movie I have seen in theaters since Daredevil. Usually there will be a few scenes in Rom-Coms that make me at least giggle. Didn't happen here. Everything was predicatable, not funny and lame. The Orphan had to have been better. And why does Gerard Butler only speak with one side of his mouth? It's like the David Beckham effect and I can't stand it.

G-Force - Did not see: But I laugh every time I see the trailer where the mice chant, "Poop in his hand! Poop in his hand!"

The Final Destination - Did not see: Why are they still making these? And is there really that much going on under an escalator?

if I missed one, please feel free to give your own review.

Burning Down the House - Talking Heads


  1. Funny People was hilarious...first Adam Sandler movie worth watching since Big Daddy. Pretty easy to say that because the others have been so bad, but still a must see movie for anyone who likes stand up comedy.

    I saw Taking Woodstock yesterday and it was pretty bad. There was no attempt at recreating the concert and only a few cool songs throughout the whole movie. I don't regret seeing it because Woodstock was sweet, but given the subject I expected more.

  2. Like you I hate Bradley Cooper as well, probably because I hated his character in Wedding Crashers, Sack.

    Anyways, one you missed, Inglorious Basterds. Your typical Tarantino film, broken up into chapters, lots of death and some historical liberties taken (not that that should come as a surprise). I liked it. Couple voiceover cameos by Samuel L. Jackson and Harvey Kaitel, staples of Tarantino films. One thing I did find hard to believe was the guy from The Office that plays Ryan, being a savage killer, just don't see it and Diane Kruger (the love interest from the National Treasure movies) is an awful actress. Very good turns by Mike Myers in a small role as a British General and Christoph Waltz as Hans Landa shines(The Jew Hunter).

    Public Enemies was a little disappointing for me as well, they made Bale out to be more of a badass than Purvis was (perhaps they did that because he threatened to go crazy on a lighting guy). Also way too much focus on the love story with Depp's character and the girl. Although it was nice to see Speedle formerly of CSI: Miami fame have gainful employment again.

  3. all in "Public Enemies" is inaccurate:Purvis,Dillinger and Frechette.
    Unless Purvis is an interesting guy because Dillinger is just an nice gangster who wants to be in love with his girlfriend in this movie and the love story is too dull!
    And "Public Enemies" was made before "Terminator 4"

  4. I forgot to review Terminator: Salvation! C+. Better than Terminator 3, but not nearly as good as the first two. I was also distracted the whole movie because I was trying to decide if it was a prequel or sequel. I think I decided it was a prequel.